Let Me Go
by MoonytheMarauder1
Summary: Regulus Black watched his brother leave the first time; now he'll try to get him back. Unfortunately, some things aren't made to last.


**A/N: Hey y'all! This was written for Hogwarts. Other prompts are listed below. :)**

 **Foreign Exchange Task 2: Write about the differences between two people**

 **Word Count: 2410**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Those rights go to JK Rowling.**

 **Enjoy!**

Regulus stood in the hallway of the upper floor of Number 12, Grimmauld Place, clutching his pillow to his chest. At fourteen, he wouldn't normally rely on such a thing for comfort, but this was a special case.

Sirius was leaving.

Honestly, it was as though his older brother thought he was being subtle. In reality, nothing looked more conspicuous than a heavy trunk, and Regulus told him so.

Sirius looked around, his grey eyes unsurprised, and Regulus thought that maybe his brother hadn't been as ignorant to his presence as he originally thought.

"You're leaving," Regulus stated emotionlessly. He knew that was what was happening, and he closed off all feeling—he would not cry in front of his brother. It didn't matter that they no longer saw eye-to-eye; family came first, and Sirius ought to have known that.

"I am," Sirius agreed, just as stoically. He ran a hand through his long black hair and sighed. "I am."

Regulus hugged the pillow closer to his body, something he had done when he had nightmares as a child. Sirius picked up on the movement, and Regulus hated that his older brother could identify his feelings. "Why? You don't have to."

Sirius looked at him in disbelief, his grey eyes that Regulus shared incredulous. "You can't honestly think that. They want me to join— _him._ I'd rather die."

Regulus glared at the floor. He didn't understand why Sirius played this game with their parents—he could pretend all he wanted, but he couldn't completely sever ties with their family. He was a Black, after all. It would be impossible to be immune to their ideals. "He's not that bad. He's protecting us from—"

" _Protecting_ us?" Sirius repeated with scorn. "Reg, have they fooled you so terribly that you honestly believe that he is _protecting_ anyone? All he's doing is harming people. Killing them. And for what? Blood purity?" Sirius shook his head, looking disappointed. "You know, a friend of mine said once that purity of heart determines purity of blood—since it pumps it, and all."

Regulus pulled a face; it had seemed very poetic up until the last bit. "Who told you that?"

"Hope."

"There isn't a Hope at—"

Sirius waved his words aside. "Doesn't matter. The point is, I'm leaving this toxic household, and you're coming with me."

Regulus took three steps back, startled. "I'm not—I'm not leaving!"

Sirius looked eager, and Regulus wondered how he possibly could have missed the fact that his younger brother was not at odds with his parents. "Reg, you don't have to be afraid. I know somewhere we can go where they can't touch us. We'll be safe, and free to think like we want to."

Regulus sneered, unwittingly mimicking generations of Blacks before him. "That's what you want. I'm not the odd one out here; you are. You're so selfish!"

Sirius gaped at him. "Me? _Selfish?"_

"Yes!" seethed Regulus. "You just assume that I think the same way you do, and you're so focused on yourself that you haven't even realized that I don't agree with you! You're the only one in this house who wants to leave. Don't drag me with you."

Sirius' face was pale, and Regulus felt the beginnings of triumph—he had shaken the unshakable Sirius Black.

Finally, Sirius spoke. "You're not, not really. Like them, I mean. I thought you realized that. Mother is a monster." The harsh words were unexpected, and Regulus recoiled; Sirius didn't stop there. "Father is a monster. Every single Death Eater, every blood fanatic, they are all monsters. And do you know why? They will do _anything_ to reach their goal. They will hurt _anyone._ Don't become like them. Don't fool yourself into thinking you have to be."

With those words, Sirius turned on his heel and descended the stairs. He glanced over his shoulder at the young boy in the hallway, still clutching his pillow; his eyes softened, but they were still full of regret. "Once you make a choice, you can't come back, you know."

His warning fell on deaf ears. "It's you who's making a mistake. You're going to regret it."

Sirius shook his head and lifted his trunk in the air. "No, I won't."

Regulus watched him go, wondering why he didn't alert his parents. Part of him thought Sirius would come back; the other knew he wouldn't. Still, despite how far apart they'd grown, Regulus couldn't help but feel like a piece of himself was leaving with his brother.

* * *

Three years later, Regulus found himself lost in Muggle London, searching desperately for the person he'd come looking for—his brother.

They hadn't so much as written to each other since Sirius ran away all that time ago, much less spoken to one another. Regulus couldn't quite figure out why he'd decided to seek the man out now, but there he was. He'd heard rumors from others that his brother had a Muggle repair shop in the city somewhere, and he'd felt the need to see him.

If he was honest with himself, then he would admit that he wanted to see how his brother would respond to recent events; to see if Sirius would change his mind.

It took a while, but Regulus eventually found the place he was looking for. It was a run-down auto repair shop, and the young man felt very out of place in his fine-tailored coat. He approached the entrance, his lip curling, then caught a glimpse of the person he wanted to see.

"Sirius."

The man crouched beside a Muggle motorbike whipped around, revealing a grime-stained face that was red from exertion and long black hair that was held back in a careless bun. It stole the breath from Regulus' lungs; he knew that Sirius must have grown in the years since he'd seen him properly, but this… At nineteen years, Sirius looked much handsomer than he ever had in the House of Black, if such a thing was possible with such a scruffy appearance. His grey eyes held more sadness, but there was also a hint of something stronger—the pleasure of freedom. His face was more angular, and his shoulders were squared in a way that showed his lean muscles and the pride with which he held himself.

Sirius didn't stand up, silently saying that he didn't fear the person before him. "Regulus. Why are you here?"

Regulus considered leaning against one of the vehicles, but decided against it; there was no use in wasting all the galleons he'd spent buying this coat. "I wanted to talk."

Sirius snorted, finally revealing the hot-headed teenager Regulus remembered; it put him at ease. "Don't mistake me for a fool. You only want to talk because you want something from me."

Regulus took a few steps closer. "Always so quick to judge."

"Always so quick to condemn," Sirius shot back bitterly. He stood up, wiping his hands on his Muggle jeans, never breaking eye contact with his little brother. "Tell me what you want; no more of these games."

Regulus discreetly cast a Silencing Charm around them, lest some stray Muggle pick up part of their conversation. He cut right to the chase, a strange excitement mounting in his chest; he was proud of what he was about to tell his brother. "I am a Death Eater."

Almost instantly, Sirius' wand was in his hand, ready to be brandished at the younger man. "Why are you here?" he barked.

Regulus held his hands up, to show he meant no harm. "I'm not here to harm you—"

"This time," Sirius cut in angrily. "What, you joined their little club and came running to tell your estranged brother before anyone else? Don't lie to me, Regulus."

"I'm not here to do harm," Regulus insisted. His stomach twisted at Sirius' words; if his plan didn't work… "I'm here to talk to you. To see if, during these years of what must have been a great hardship for you, you'd reconsider your position in the war."

Sirius laughed mirthlessly. "You've come to insult me, then, by asking if I would throw away all my morals for a life of luxury. The answer is no. And Regulus," he murmured suddenly, "I hope the rough ground scars your knees, since you'll be doing so much kneeling at Voldemort's feet."

Regulus recoiled; if there was one thing besides blood purity that was ingrained in a Black, it was that they bowed to no one. "I serve no one."

Sirius grinned wickedly, though there was no humor to be found in this situation. "You've lost all sense, clearly. You're not following him; you are serving him. He will work you like a slave, and when he has no further use of you, you will be cast aside like you were nothing. There is no loyalty within those ranks—only fear and ambition."

"If I prove myself faithful, then that won't matter!" Regulus retorted, his grey eyes darkening with anger.

Sirius looked at him oddly for a while. "It's not too late to change sides," he finally whispered. "I know that our relationship has all but crumbled to pieces, but there's still time. I don't want Voldemort to hurt my younger brother."

"I don't want him to hurt my elder brother," Regulus admitted softly, his anger draining away. "That's why I've come; to take you with me. If you ally yourself with him, then he won't harm you."

"He has more important people to chase after than me," Sirius said flippantly. "And if—"

"He said he wants to hurt you," Regulus interrupted softly. "He's angry with you, and if you join him, there won't be any need for you to be punished. He's forgiving; he'll overlook your past mistakes. He even convinced Mother and Father to overlook them; you'll be part of the family again!"

To Regulus, there was no greater reward than this. Surely, Sirius must long for their home? How could he be content to be forever severed from the people who'd raised him, who only wanted the best for him?

"I can't do that, Regulus."

His eyes snapped over to his brother, whose eyes were reluctant but stood tall. "What do you mean?"

Sirius rolled his shoulders, something Regulus knew he did when he was searching for the words to say something he'd rather not talk about. "I don't want to be a part of our family," he said at last. "I don't believe that they are good people, or that they're fighting for something noble. I've spent the last few years trying to prove myself in spite of them. They want to be respected, but if that stems from fear, well… I want no part of it."

It stung to know that his brother hated their family—hated _him—_ but he wouldn't let himself dwell in it. He was going to convince Sirius to change sides—he couldn't bear the thought of someone taking his brother from him. Sirius was a _Black_ , and Blacks stuck together. "He wants to _kill you!"_

Sirius' eyes glinted dangerously. "I'm not afraid of death!"

And there was his weakness, Regulus realized; he couldn't stand the thought of being called a coward. "Is that it, then? The great Sirius Black is too afraid to face his parents again?"

Sirius scoffed. "Don't try to play that card; it won't work. Listen, you're wasting your time here. I've already chosen to fight for a side, and it isn't the one you've chosen. Obviously I won't sway you to leave those ranks, so—so just go."

"You're no angel, Sirius," he said venomously. "The things you've done—what makes you think that you deserve to be a hero?" Sirius closed his eyes, and Regulus knew he had touched a nerve. He pushed on. "What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to do the best I can!" Sirius opened his eyes, full of fire. "I know that I've done some shitty things in my life, but I have to try to protect the people I care about. The people you're targeting—they're my family."

"We're your—"

"No, you're not," Sirius said shortly. "You all are trying to mold me into something I'm not. My friends—Muggleborns, half-bloods, blood traitors—they don't care about appearances, they just accept me, flaws and all. As long as I am a good person, they won't drive me away."

"Mudbloods—"

"Muggleborns," Sirius corrected, looking furious. "If you use that word again, I will hex you. By taking that mark—" He gestured to Regulus' left forearm, where the Dark Mark lay hidden beneath his sleeve. "—you renounced any familial ties we had left." Sirius shook his head, his movements heavy with grief. "We're just too different now. We can't get back what we had, so there's no point in trying."

It was as though he had struck Regulus; the breath was knocked from his lungs and his knees felt weak. He didn't approve of Sirius' beliefs, but he had wanted to have the same close relationship with his brother that they'd had when they were younger. He refused to show this weakness though, and instead turned his nose up and sneered down at his brother.

"You're right. Your friends' dirty blood had corrupted yours."

Sirius' eyes flashed. "Get out of here. Now."

Regulus turned on his heel and began to stalk off, but paused a few meters away. "We never mention this again. I was never here."

"Works for me," Sirius told him, crouching back down to work on the motorbike. "I don't want to be seen with you, anyway. Oh, and Regulus?"

Regulus turned to face his brother, arching a brow. "Yes?"

Sirius looked him dead in the eye, and his tone sent shivers down the Death Eater's spine. "If you touch my family in any way, I will not hesitate to retaliate."

The younger man didn't speak for a moment. He believed in the purity of blood; he believed in what Voldemort stood for. He wasn't sure he'd be able to stomach torturing or killing another person, but he knew that Sirius would if it could protect the people he cared about. They'd grown so far apart that the distance between them was impossible to cross.

He thought of the war approaching, and Sirius' promised threat. He said simply, "I suppose war makes murderers of us all."

He walked away, neither brother sparing the other another glance. After all, neither could know that those would be the last words they'd ever say to one another.

 **A/N: Prompts:**

 **Writing Club:**

 **Character Appreciation: Regulus — (plot point) becoming a Death Eater quite young.**

 **Disney Challenge: Dialogue: 3. "What are you going to do?" / "I'm going to do the best I can!"**

 **Cookie's Crafty Corner: 5. Alt. Write about having to explain yourself.**

 **Book Club: Greta — (word) monster, (action) walking out on someone, (word) scars**

 **Showtime: 8. Prick! Goes the Scorpion's Tale — (color) black**

 **Amber's Attic: 13. Saw — game**

 **Lyric Alley: 2. Couldn't look you in the eye**

 **Ami's Audio Admirations: (Don't Fear) The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult — Write about a character not fearing death**

 **Sophie's Shelf: 6. (dialogue) "He/She said he/she wants to hurt you."**

 **Emy's Emporium: 6. Alt. (quote) "You're no angel, [name]."**

 **Angel's Arcade: Eyedol — (dialogue) "I serve no one.", (theme) betrayal, (location) Muggle London**

 **Lo's Lowdown: Characters: 2. Dean Winchester — Alt. Write about an older sibling**

 **Bex's Basement: 1. I Put a Spell on You by Nina Simone — Alt. Write about someone being possessive.**

 **Film Festival: 19. (dialogue) "We never mention this again."**

 **Autumn Funfair:**

 **Bingo: 17. Regulus Black (2)**

 **Gris-Gris Bag:**

 **(dialogue) "You're going to regret it."**


End file.
